Aggravating game design... The "how not to make a game" thread.

[wisdom000]

Aggravating game design... The "how not to make a game" thread.

Ok, this thread is more of a "what not to do" in game design... this is not just a place to post flames about whatever games you hate... this is for games you otherwise adore, but have that one or two things that just drives you fucking bonkers.... Be it something just absurdly hard (the tow diversion in SR2) or just shit that drives you crazy for how poorly something was handled....

For instance... games that don't have a "Skip The Bullshit" Button. It's bloody 2013, Video games have been readily available to the public for nearly 50 years. Why the fuckity fucking shit are there still games coming out where you can't skip the bullshit, especially for things inside of missions, where if you die, you have to watch/listen to the same bullshit over and over again... Game designers who don't grasp the simple concept of "skipping the bullshit" at least after you have seen it once, can die in a fire while being anally raped by grizzly bears.

Open world games where there is no way to save other than missions. I have been playing Mafia II... had it for a long time but never got around to finishing it.... there is quite a lot about the game that I like, but holy fuckballs do I hate this... so my apartment burned down, and I lost all my clothes... I just spent an hour, going to every clothier in the fucking game, rebuying my wardrobe, and then, on the way to do the next part of the mission, because that's the only way to fucking shit save in this ass fuck retarded game, my cat jumps in my lap and I drive head first into a cop car doing 80... instant death.... all that time and effort gone. This is shitty fucking game design.

Open world game designs without a jump button......... again, what the fuck...

Games that have exclusive content that can only be accessed by playing the highest difficulty level, but the highest difficluty level ins't available from the start.... forcing you to replay the entire game if you want the unlockable items.... SOCOM was the fucking worst about this, with not one, but bloody level that would only unlock if you beat the game on the successive difficulty... Meaning you had to play through the entire game 3 fucking times just to unlock everything. It's not like anything changed, it's not like anything was different, it's not like they couldn't have just given you the fucking option to play it at highest difficulty level right from the start like any other game company that doesn't have its head up its ass.

Repetitive difficult bullshit that was barely fun the first time, but loses all sense of entertainment on the 12 time you have to do it... The Saints Row "activities" are the perfect example of this... Some of the activities were fun, Fight Club, Fuzz, and you you didn't mind repeating them.... but then you had crap like escort, and trafficking, where the first couple of times, it was great fun.... by the 17th time you just want to strangle every inept game designer you can find with their own intestines...

What really gets under your skin in games.... particularly in games you otherwise love....

 

[Sunder]

NPCs not responding to what I do or what is currently going around.

Here's a hilariously bad example of this: Dragon Age 2.

Say you played the game as a Mage. Keep in mind that in this game the Mages are either kept in Circles of Magi which are overseen by Templars so they don't abuse their powers, due to some past events with a mage-centric empire, or they're hunted down and killed. So there you are, in broad day, throwing fireballs, summoning lightning from the sky and the NPCs just don't give a shit, they keep walking through your battles like they were taking a just a regular stroll. Hell, this comic explains it nicely.

View attachment 663

 

[darcler]

NPCs that will tell the story of their lifes to any random armed passerby in proximity, then ask him to take the Ancient Motherfucking World Eating Artifact of +17 to their cousin in the next town. And to bring groceries on the way back.

Unskippable publisher logo at the beginning. WTH?

No quicksave.

Forced badassery of characters.

Chore-like in-game activities, and UI one has to struggle with to find a frigging letter a courier has just delivered.

 

[goopit]

shiny stuff on the ground

Forced badassery of characters.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlM79v9ddYs&t=63m55s

 

[darcler]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlM79v9ddYs&t=63m55s

I lol'd.

 

[Lolssi83.811]

For instance... games that don't have a "Skip The Bullshit" Button. It's bloody 2013, Video games have been readily available to the public for nearly 50 years. Why the fuckity fucking shit are there still games coming out where you can't skip the bullshit, especially for things inside of missions, where if you die, you have to watch/listen to the same bullshit over and over again... Game designers who don't grasp the simple concept of "skipping the bullshit" at least after you have seen it once, can die in a fire while being anally raped by grizzly bears.

Quick save (or at least manual)is the savior after cutscenes
So yeah don't make save system based on checkpoints only or one that tosses you to other side of the map than where you saved after load. After load you should be exactly where you were when saving. No enemies spawned etc.
Games that don't allow you to remap keys and I mean all keys.
Timed missions (unless I can come back to loot and explore later .
Unskippable logos like Dacler said. I'm fine forced to watch'em once but not reverytime.
Conversation system like in Skyrim. Nothing affected anything. And all topics could have been behind one line since it didn't make any difference in which order you chose'em.

 

[layne101]

shiny stuff on the ground



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlM79v9ddYs&t=63m55s

cringeworthy

 

[Don_Carnage]

Level Cap. - I loved Fallout New Vegas until I hit the max level. Then I just stopped playing it. My entire strategy in the game of taking it slow and building skills was shot to hell once I hit this ceiling that I had not been warned about.

The "Fit in in the Box" Inventory - See 'Deus Ex' for more explanation.

Unlimited Inventory. - Make it realistic. especially make it obvious that I'm sporting a rifle and 2 handguns and a cyberdeck, and a spare helmet, etc...

Finding extra ammo and supplies in stupid places - How often to office workers really keep boxes of 12 gauge ammo in their desks?

Realistic Ammo Diversity - I hate games that are "Pistol Ammo", "Rifle Ammo," "SMG Ammo." Give it the insane diversity the real world has or even the Cyberpunk tabletop game has.

Realistic Weapon Upgrades - A silencer can only fit on a specific caliber, they're not universal, and if I want to put a silencer on a gun I need a threaded barrel. And if I want to take my silencer off and put it on a different gun that fits it, I should be able to.

Ventilation ducts that a human can fit though.

 

[Sardukhar]

Oh, I can fit you through a ventilation duct...Vrree...eeeeEEE!

Er.

-Checkpoint instead of saves.

-Inventory juggling

- Infinite inventory. Yes, both of these annoy me. Pff.

-Dead World. You know, you run the mage's guild and idiot NPCs suggest you need to join the mage's guild. Grr.

-NPC patterns. They do the same thing. Forever. Plastic-world!

-Immune world. Long firefight down Main street, dozens killed, cars on fire, windows broken...go around the block and everything is normal again. Forever.

-No jumping. Yes I know we don't hop that much IRL. Gluing my feet to the ground makes me claustrophobic.

-Invisible walls. At least have an excuse. Or use ArmA's trick and make it a desert out there.

-NPCs I can't terminate.

And so many many many more. I have issues. A LOT of issues! Er. In games.Yes.

 

[Garrison72]

What really gets under your skin in games.... particularly in games you otherwise love....

-jump buttons. Seriously. It looks video gamey and ridiculous in TP. I prefer contextual commands.

-the whole world is a facade, you can enter three bldgs..

-slow, clunky movement

-poor driving physics

-no quick save function

-playing the thug. In GTA, we play a thug. In SR3, we play a thug. In Mafia we play an Italian thug. And in GTA5. Guess what! We get to play THREE thugs! Apparently this is the best excuse most writers can come up with to justify the fact we can wreak havoc in the environment. I'm sick of it.

-lack of depth, in both story and gameplay.

 

[dragonbird]

- Agree with Wisdom on the "skip the bullshit" button, exclusive content, repetitive content.
- Homes and offices full of cardboard boxes.
- Dialogue choices that don't come close to what the character actually says when you select the option
- Junk loot
- Excessive reuse of environments, especially interiors (everyone having the same paintings on their walls)
- Too much suspension of disbelief, excessive plot-holes (here's looking at you, DA2)
- Online requirement for stand-alone game
- Most kinds of DRM

NPCs that will tell the story of their lifes to any random armed passerby in proximity, then ask him to take the Ancient Motherfucking World Eating Artifact of +17 to their cousin in the next town. And to bring groceries on the way back.

OK. What game was that? You HAVE to be thinking of a specific example here, that was much too detailed.

 

[wisdom000]

- Agree with Wisdom on the "skip the bullshit" button, exclusive content, repetitive content.
- Homes and offices full of cardboard boxes.
- Dialogue choices that don't come close to what the character actually says when you select the option
- Junk loot
- Excessive reuse of environments, especially interiors (everyone having the same paintings on their walls)
- Too much suspension of disbelief, excessive plot-holes (here's looking at you, DA2)
- Online requirement for stand-alone game
- Most kinds of DRM

Oh sistah, we are on a roll here....

Having millions of dollars, but only being able to live in a shitty studio apartment., with a 2 car limit... when there are dozens upon dozens of vehicles in the game. Mercenary 2 was the worst, where there were scads of vechicles, both civilian and military, but you could not store any of them.... you could buy them, but they had to be airlifted to you, for a hefty price, and once you called them, there was no way to put them back.... you had to buy another one, and not all of them were available more than once... and none of the civilian vehicles were available.... I played that game 4 5 hours before realizing this, then hucked the game out the back door after I realized that the groovy sports car with guns I got to drive for 10 minutes before a tank ran over it would not be available to me again... Fuck that shit. I had a giant villa under my control, with tons of space, and yet I couldn't store any of the vehicles I stole or appropriated. Fucking lame sauce.

Garages you cannot organize

Games that feature vehicles heavily, but do not allow you to customize them... at the very least to choose their color.

Games whose sequels play mechanically identically, but have fewer gameplay options than their predecessors... GTA 4, Saints Row 3, I am looking at you.

Not being able to have multiple saves... and not being able to name the saves, or at least make a notation as to what they are.

Taking away all my characters shit as a plot element... FUCK THAT.... It's one thing to do it as a one off mission, and then return your crap to you. Or for their to be a possibility of it, if you do something stupid, like leave your door open, or make a wrong choice... but just to throw it into the plot is just a bullshit plot element utilized by asshole game designers. Especially in games where you spend an inordinate amount of time collecting things, or their are unique items which you cannot get back.

DLC that is completely removed from the main game.... Look, Lost and The Damned and the Ballad of Gay Tony were awesome and fun, and both of the protagonists were cooler than Niko, but they were just separate games that took place in the same world.... and the new vehicles, weapons, garage spaces, and mechanics, did not show up in the main game... and that was ass.

Bullshit DLC period. I like dlc, I really do.... I like new cars, new guns, new clothes... I fucking love new storylines. But if you are going to put out DLC don;t make it bullshit. Don't give me nothing but clownshoes DLC with silly bullshit items, at least not without a larger amount of cool, worthwhile shit. And for god's sake, don't give me bullshit "mission" expansions that just give you the most boring aspects of the game reskinned as if the consumer is an idiot. Story and DLC missions should expand and enhance the game... not just provide ten minutes of yucks before they are never used again. The Fallout 3 and Fallout New Vegas expansions were fantastic... not only giving you more story, and more gear, but new map areas as well...

And for fucks sake, if you are making a mature game, don't fucking pander to children. Don't tell me my game is for adults, then fill it with giant tits, fart and dick jokes, and every stupid asinine bit of bullshti you can think of. Either make an adult game, or make a game for kids.... don't do both and then slap a Mature rating on it. If youa re making a game for adults, treat the audience like adults, not like hyperactive idiots with the attention span of coked out juvenile delinquents with ADD.

 

[Sardukhar]

Fuck that shit. I had a giant villa under my control, with tons of space, and yet I couldn't store any of the vehicles I stole or appropriated. Fucking lame sauce.

Garages you cannot organize

This kills me. Every time. God love ya, Wisdom.

 

[goopit]

taking away all my characters shit as a plot element... Fuck that.... It's one thing to do it as a one off mission, and then return your crap to you. Or for their to be a possibility of it, if you do something stupid, like leave your door open, or make a wrong choice... But just to throw it into the plot is just a bullshit plot element utilized by asshole game designers. Especially in games where you spend an inordinate amount of time collecting things, or their are unique items which you cannot get back.

get insurance

 

[darcler]

OK. What game was that? You HAVE to be thinking of a specific example here, that was much too detailed.

Really? I thought it was pretty generic, even though a bit exaggerated (a tiny bit). Didn't have any specific game in mind

 

[username_3641692]

Oh, I can fit you through a ventilation duct...Vrree...eeeeEEE!

Er.

-Checkpoint instead of saves.

-Inventory juggling

- Infinite inventory. Yes, both of these annoy me. Pff.

-Dead World. You know, you run the mage's guild and idiot NPCs suggest you need to join the mage's guild. Grr.

-NPC patterns. They do the same thing. Forever. Plastic-world!

-Immune world. Long firefight down Main street, dozens killed, cars on fire, windows broken...go around the block and everything is normal again. Forever.

-No jumping. Yes I know we don't hop that much IRL. Gluing my feet to the ground makes me claustrophobic.

-Invisible walls. At least have an excuse. Or use ArmA's trick and make it a desert out there.

-NPCs I can't terminate.

And so many many many more. I have issues. A LOT of issues! Er. In games.Yes.

Indeed

 

[dreambled]

Open world games that don't have a fast travel system. Hell, regular games that force you to backtrack after completing a quest like TW2 instead of just teleporting you back to the start. I complete quests then I have to spend 5 minutes running all the way back to town, trying to dodge and run past all the monsters I don't want to fight so I continue doing quests.

NPCs that don't acknowledge when I've done something ... or you know what? I'm just gonna say it, when they don't know their place. Skyrim is a good example of that. All those guards talk shit and it's like I am the fucking dragonborn. I saved the world, rode and killed dragons, killed and murdered countless people and I'm the thane of this town you're guarding. Wtf have you done lately besides changed the bandage on your knee?

NPCs who don't freak the fuck out when you break into their home and steal all their shit right in front of their face. In fact they'll offer you more money because they want you to complete some task for them.

Unrealistic dialogue. Or dialogue that doesn't flow well at all. A lot of RPGs are guilty of this. The NPC tells you their brother just died. You go through all the investigation questions because you know ... you don't know if they'll go away after providing an answer that pushes the conversation forward. So you ask shit like what did your brother do, how did the family react, why did they die, how did that make NPC feel. After the NPC tells you that that's when they decided to get into the mercenary career and got their revenge, you finally pick an answer that will properly continue the conversation and your character says "... Well, I'm sorry to here that." Excuse me, what? You are sorry that ... he's a merc and got his revenge? I just wish answers would change based on whether or not you did investigations or not.

Shitty character creators.

Games with unresponsive controls ...

And a lot of what other people said.

 

[darcler]

Escort missions. Next to fetch quests, another big blight of CRPGs, and in certain aspects even worse than acting as errand boy. This is when a free-roaming open world turns into an on-rail quasi-action game, escpecially when the person you're supposed to escort dashes forward without looking back and straight into the largest group of enemies (s)he can find. Other times you have to patiently wait for their AI to struggle with finding a path on an empty road and not stumble on a knee-high rock. It's frustrating, boring, time-consuming, and simply bad design. There. Should. Not. Be. Escort. Missions.

 

[Suhiira]

And for fucks sake, if you are making a mature game, don't fucking pander to children. Don't tell me my game is for adults, then fill it with giant tits, fart and dick jokes, and every stupid asinine bit of bullshti you can think of. Either make an adult game, or make a game for kids.... don't do both and then slap a Mature rating on it. If youa re making a game for adults, treat the audience like adults, not like hyperactive idiots with the attention span of coked out juvenile delinquents with ADD.

Hear ! Hear !
If it's an "adult" game don't make it for what a 13-year-old thinks is "adult".

 

[wisdom000]

This kills me. Every time. God love ya, Wisdom.

My ocd and need to organize to my taste is a crippling disability when it comes to video games.... and life...

Escort missions. Next to fetch quests, another big blight of CRPGs, and in certain aspects even worse than acting as errand boy. This is when a free-roaming open world turns into an on-rail quasi-action game, escpecially when the person you're supposed to escort dashes forward without looking back and straight into the largest group of enemies (s)he can find. Other times you have to patiently wait for their AI to struggle with finding a path on an empty road and not stumble on a knee-high rock. It's frustrating, boring, time-consuming, and simply bad design. There. Should. Not. Be. Escort. Missions.

I like the idea of escort missions, but christ on a crutch I hate the implementation of them... always.... hey fucktard, just get in the goddamn car....

Hear ! Hear !
If it's an "adult" game don't make it for what a 13-year-old thinks is "adult".

A-fucking-men...

This is not to say don't have humor... jsut don't make it obvious and juvenile... we are adults, we can handle subtlety.