Some of the funniest (Or Oddest) Quoates in game!

[TheBaldGuy]

Some of the funniest (Or Oddest) Quoates in game!

Well i have heard some funny things in this game and i love it. To me i can tell when a game company puts time into their dialogue and i for one appreciate it. It also happens in DA Inq, Which i just finished the other day finaly.

Anyway, i was just restarting the game after being about 20% in because i just got a new shiny video card and want to start over on ultra settings! Plus, now that i know what i am doing a bit better i want to play on a harder diff. So at the start of the game, i mean the VERY start where u go to train with ciri, i am walking around the room looking for the key to the door and i investigate Yen's perfume and she says 'Geralt, stop fingering my toiletries." and it made me chauckle so i thought i would come here and start this light hearted thread about what u may have heard throughout the game

 

[Smurfin]

"Can I become a witcherette ? please, please, please".

I always laugh everytime I hear that. ;D

 

[claytasha]

"Corpse teeth and kidney stones...tried remedies, for trying times."

 

[i_K33L_n0085]

When a doppler changes to look exactly like Geralt.
And he responds with: "Damn I look old."

 

[snakey_77]

theres 2 pulp fiction references in there as well .. I'm not going to say which find out for your selves!!!

 

[Vastator88]

"I'm a material girl in a material world" -girls in the brothel.

"to puke or not to puke, that is the... (question)" -drunk soldiers

 

[TheBaldGuy]

"I'm a material girl in a material world" -girls in the brothel.

"to puke or not to puke, that is the... (question)" -drunk soldiers

haha, i have actualy heard a few 80's song references in the game so far.

 

[bobbysolace]

"This-is-skelliigeeeeeeee"

 

[SoulTrain75]

i laugh when they say "he's conjuring he's conjuring."

 

[Eruvadhor]

When Triss tells Geralt to shackle her, he suggests (kinky sex) might not be the best idea in a public square, and she tells him they have a use outside the bedroom. Was not expecting that *at all*. Had a good laugh.

And basically anything a Rock Troll has to say

 

[Iorael]

*mild Spoiler*
When you have to get drunk in order to bait a monster and once you see it Geralt says: "Come out and fight, Bitch!"

 

[unwizzo]

"War. War never changes" and in one of the Scoia'tael camps: "War always changes"

 

[AdrynBliss]

'Radovid sucks flaccid cock'. I'd like to think myself more mature but hearing that cracked me up.

 

[gamertech100]

Geralt - "and It became a botchling"

Bloody Baron - "A fucking what?"

 

[tiamatloc]

Is the second sword in case the first one breaks? Very clever!

 

[whtbread85]

"I hear you have an imp problem. Or was that an imp-perfection in the notice."

Most cringe-worthy line ever. Have a save file just so I can go back to it.

---------- Updated at 04:13 PM ----------

Sorry had to post one more. We Geralt I'd asking Dandelion's Ex's about where he is one of them says he was with a "girl from Kovir, whore-vir is more like it." Almost fell out of my chair on that line.

 

[backrow12]

not so much the dialog options but a few things that are pretty damn funny

Rock Troll drawing Redanian Eagle, result is not what I'd expected... (dialog with the patriotic Rock Troll is top notch, too)

Super secret druid mission (master alchemist quest), once I figured out what was happening

 

[etsubmariner13]

On a remote island on Skellige, one village has three great ones:
1) (little girl in a sing-song voice when its raining) ~ It's rain-ING, put on your tun-IC~
2) An old man says, "Foreigners don't understand the isles. This. IS. SKELLIGE!"
3) When its raining, another young lad says "I'm a puddle-jumper!" as he darts here and there

 

[howlingsiren]

Pretty much every word that comes out of Dijkstra's mouth. That guy is a master of sarcasm and had me in stitches almost every time he spoke. Particularly the whole sequence investigating the robbery with Bart the troll.

Geralt commenting on the massive hole in the wall to the vault: "Take it the thieves got in through the hole behind you?
Dijkstra: "You're a regular fucking master sleuth. Any other brilliant deductions you want confirmed? The year maybe? Bloody name of Redania's king?"

Geralt asking Dijsktra to describe the creature he encountered in the sewers: "You must've noticed something. Was it..."
Dijkstra: "No, didn't notice a fucking thing. Didn't do a taxonomic field study analysis either. I know it's an inconvenience to you, but I felt I should get the hell out of there as fast as I could".

Some brilliant acting on the part of his voice actor. This game has so many well-developed and well-acted secondary characters, it's a joy to behold.

 

[azuretreble]

Spoiler

The 1st part of the Cabaret secondary quest

. The whole dialogue with The Bandit(Geralt) and the Crimson Avenger(Dandelion).
That whole thing was so cringeworthy and funny.