Well, I finished the game yesterday and it was devastating.
So I am doing what I did to cope with Mass Effect 3. A drink and writing on the forums. Reddit is too busy circlenerking between "buggy mess hurrdurr" and Panam's butt.
The "Hold the Line community" from ME3 helped me immensely to cope with the ending and we got an extended cut out of it, so here we go.
I love this game. I was very close to refunding after reading initial reviews and forum posts, but I was glad that I didn't.
I experienced a lot of bugs, nothing gamebreaking, some were annoying, but I never even thought one second about refunding the game again.
Like in every first playthrough of an RPG it took a while to find my footing which meant I wasted a lot of skill points, made poor decisions and so on.
That is why I decided to say "fuck it" and rushed to the end with the intention to start a second playthrough right after.
I got nearly every sidequest completed but didn't try at all to 100% the game.
I unfortunately got the ending I ended up choosing spoilered to some extent and expected to ride into the sunset with my Nomad family and girlfriend Panam.
It was dubbed the "Happy Ending".
Too bad I got Mass Effected at that point. This game supposedly has 7 (!) Endings and V dies in every.single.one. In some he dies instantly, in others (like the Nomad one) he has weeks left to live.
I felt like I got punched. It is so sad, because the ending was fantastically done, the videos playing alongside the credits gave me goosebumps.
Every Skillpoint, every decision, every relationship I built overall didn't matter, because freaking NC-Legend V will die to Keeanu-Cancer anyways. God, CDPR probably ruined him for me and I adore him in real life.
Maybe I am too much of a softie, but I play games like these to forget about real life problems and hardships not to play through them again.
If I want to see despair and sad people who can't change their fate, no matter how hard they try, I would just go to work where I deal with the victims of Covid.
Is it too much to ask for a true Happy Ending that makes me feel like my time was well spent? Esp. this year?
I mean it is not like we didn't suffer hardships. My V lost Jackie, Takemura, Bob, Teddy and he had to witness Saul get goombastomped by Smasher.
I was so happy that the other Aldecaldos survived and almost forgot about the six months, until Panam reminded V again..
The only thing that keeps me from being the trainwreck I was after Mass Effect 3, is my headcannon grasping at straws, that V found a cure outside of Night City and finally lived the good life he deserves with his partner.
At least CDPR left me that loophole. However I am just barely hanging in there like a Mortal Kombat character waiting for the Fatality, waiting for CPDR to confirm V is dead, no way out and know way to turn things around through DLC/fixes.
If there are any DLC's which I probably doubt, because of the fallout the game caused and they are prequel or Johnny related, I might lose my shit.
Fvck Johnny, he is a stupid parasite.
I would pay good money to a modder who could just cut every line about the "6 months left" from the nomad ending (it would still make sense, you wouldn't miss anything) or create something better, like MEHEM did for Mass Effect.
I started my day eager to finish the game and embark on the journey anew, hell my wife will hate me for playing through the night, but now I am probably holding back on a second playthrough for a while.
There are only 2 good things I can see in the endings:
1. Bioware hopefully takes notes with ME4 or the fans will launch them into orbit once and for all.
2. I have new motivation to finish writing my book, just because I want to write a Happy Ending so badly now.