The Forlorn Hope: Cyberpunk Off-Topic

[Sardukhar]

Iambic pentameter! You challenge my thirty-year old Lit. skillset. Lessee..

As John wrote bold the tale he told, "No Way!"

Out-cried The Bird, her Ire a-stirred, "False vision!"

"You see less true than a pile o'poo, verily!"

"Suckit, do you, most to-tally, John-son."

Sard saw, reading no flaw, a diff'rent story

"To say, some wrong, it's true of everybody

But here, think I, less wrong are they than many"

The Bird, she grins and draws her guns, most smoothly

"Oh, see, Sar-dine, these thoughts have I. Ready?"

"You bet!" said he, "Dual-wield, that sure is silly!'

The smoke it cleared, the sight it wasn't pretty.

Organ and limb, cyber and stim, red 'n messy.

Out of blue skies, medtechs arrive, lights on.

"These two, parts new, prolly recyc a ton.

Slice 'em, dice 'em sell 'em to the Doc."

So they did. Welcome to Night City.

 

[dragonbird]

The dragon flees across the skies in terror
Shocked to find that in this forum there're
People who, when faced with choice of topic
Choose not to display their fav'rite catpic
But instead to post in rhyme. Such whimsy.
What a shame your argument's so flimsy.

@227

Dun-dun. Dun-dun, dun-dun, dun-dun (ay ay ay). DUN-DUN, dun-dun, dun-dun (*rattle*)

Not bad, but too many syllables. Anyway, I always think of whisky.

 

[Sardukhar]

Ha! Great!

 

[227]

See what you two did? You turn this thread into an English class, and suddenly no one wants to post for the same reason I was constantly "sick" in high school.

If you had turned this thread into a "post your funniest cat pictures" thread, however, we'd be inundated by posts. Posts from old members, posts from lurkers, posts from new members, posts from time-travelers who came back in time to post cat pictures.

Instead, they're all staying in their own time period, fighting mutant carrots or whatever. Way to go.

 

[Neural_Cipher]

your wishes are granted

View attachment 1018

 

[dragonbird]

I was wondering how long it would be before someone posted again, and who it would be. I got the person right, anyway.

And yeah, if it had lasted more than a couple of days, I'd have blinked first and posted a catpic. Or a dogpic. But it wouldn't have been as funny as that one.

I'll just throw this one in, as it's already uploaded because I needed it to illustrate a point over at The Witcher forums.

----


Awww, 227. I just noticed that you tried to elevate the cultural tone of the thread a couple of days ago by punning. And nobody noticed. I'm so sorry. Next time, use a different font or something so that it shows up better. Comic Sans maybe?

 

[dethfuk]

Oh wow a post thread

hmmm what should i post?

Oh yeah, im watching 24 season 3 atm, lol.

 

[227]

I was wondering how long it would be before someone posted again, and who it would be. I got the person right, anyway.

It was obvious I'd be the one. If you subtract slim (who doesn't seem the type to break thread lulls), then you, me, and Fat Sardine owned the past two pages. Amy was the last to post, and you knew you wouldn't. That only leaves one person, especially since most people seem to be uncomfortable popping in when there hasn't been a recent post.

I know when you're going to post, too, by the way. Mostly because of the binoculars.

hmmm what should i post?

If you have to ask, the answer is "nudes." That's one of those universal truths. Need some advice on what to order at a fancy restaurant? Nudes. Want to ask someone what the meaning of life is? Nudes.

There's no question that can't be answered with gratuitous nudity.

 

[dragonbird]

It was obvious I'd be the one. If you subtract slim (who doesn't seem the type to break thread lulls), then you, me, and Fat Sardine owned the past two pages. Amy was the last to post, and you knew you wouldn't. That only leaves one person, especially since most people seem to be uncomfortable popping in when there hasn't been a recent post.

I'm pretty sure there's rules against explaining the magic. The actual reason was "Because."

I know when you're going to post, too, by the way. Mostly because of the binoculars.

Nope. No chance. Not at that range. And I don't have a webcam. Because.

If you have to ask, the answer is "nudes." That's one of those universal truths. Need some advice on what to order at a fancy restaurant? Nudes. Want to ask someone what the meaning of life is? Nudes.

There's no question that can't be answered with gratuitous nudity.

And that is DEFINITELY against the rules. Don't encourage him. The flamethrower's loaded for bear.

 

[Sardukhar]

Must...struggle...with....NEEDS...

 

[chriswebb2020.736]

And that is DEFINITELY against the rules. Don't encourage him. The flamethrower's loaded for bear.

“the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.”

We are born naked. The old testament clearly states that God meant for us to be naked.

DISROBE YOURSELVES MY BRETHREN!!! HEED THE WORD!!!

btw, I'm naked right now

 

[227]

Yes! We've been subjugated far too long by the tyranny of clothes, suffering under the yoke of un-nakedness. Throw off your chains, brothers and sisters, whether they be denim, mixed cotton, or whatever else, and embrace your new-found freedom!

(But don't embrace each other, because you'd all be naked and that'd be gross.)

That Genesis bit reminded me of this: link

 

[Sardukhar]

Only...parts of me are naked.

 

[chriswebb2020.736]

That Genesis bit reminded me of this: link

Also...

We at the Dark Side support and endorse this service.

JOIN US!

 

[dragonbird]

Seriously guys, enough. We do have some limits even here.

 

[Sardukhar]

You...want me to put on gloves?

Very Confused Now.

 

[227]

Awww, sad. Before I could even find an excuse to post a Mel-Gibson-from-Braveheart "Freedoooooooooooom" pic. Okay okay okay, I'll be good.

Also, Dragonbird needs a nickname. We have Fat Sardamy and Dude, Brah, but no name for our beloved moderator? This mustn't stand! Taking all suggestions.

 

[dragonbird]

Awww, sad. Before I could even find an excuse to post a Mel-Gibson-from-Braveheart "Freedoooooooooooom" pic. Okay okay okay, I'll be good.

There's never any excuse even to refer to Mel Gibson's Braveheart. The entire film was an insult to intelligence. And don't make promises that you've no intention of keeping.

Also, Dragonbird needs a nickname. We have Fat Sardamy and Dude, Brah, but no name for our beloved moderator? This mustn't stand! Taking all suggestions.

Mine's already taken, but ma'am will do nicely, thanks. And do I sense a slight deflection here? I wonder who else is still missing a nickname.

@Sard, you don't need gloves, but it would definitely be an improvement if you wore socks.

 

[Sardukhar]

Socks reduce sensation. Sensssation.

He's Dude, Brah.


Not sure how your nickname is already taken? Flappy?

 

[227]

And don't make promises that you've no intention of keeping.

It wasn't a promise—it was a statement. Statements are much easier to weasel out of, I've found.

Mine's already taken, but ma'am will do nicely, thanks. And do I sense a slight deflection here?

It was actually more of a "pivot to a safer topic while sucking up" move. What it lacks in subtlety it more than makes up for in efficacy, ma'am. Isn't "ma'am" kind of a rude term, though? Never met someone who wanted to be called that before.

I was kind of hoping to call you something like "Banzalcoatl", actually. It's fun in a mythological kind of way, is based on something that means "feathered serpent," and reinforces the presence of your banhammer.

He's Dude, Brah.

Dude, Brah is a she. Also, a Flashheart. I don't know what that means, exactly, but I choose to believe that using a stethoscope on her results in an awesome musical number.