Too much oestrogen in this thread, I thought this was a mans club?
The excellent Scottish Psychiatrist
R.D. Laing determined that relationships between lovers were analogous to a war, with each side subconsciously trying to win undeclared battles, and gain advantage. This included all kinds of emotional trickery. He made a good argument, which I'd accept may be true in some cases, but certainly not all, it
may be the norm, but that does not make it the only way. The trick is to be aware, as ever, to know thyself.