a very old East-Frysian joke:
Dutch spelling: "Hest ook boer Haarms al zeen? Dy staat/stiet met naaimasjine achterd diek aan't wormen syken/zeuken."
German spelling: "Häst ok Buér Harms al sehn? De staht/stoat mit Naimäschkien achter'd Diek ahnt Wurm' sök'n."
Translations:
Dutch: "Heb je boer Haarms al gezien? Die staat met een naaimachine achter de dijk (en is) aan het wormen zoeken."
German: "Hast du Bauer Harms schon geseh'n? Der steht mit 'ner Nähmaschine hinter'm Deich am Würmer suchen."
English: "Did you see Farmer Haarms? He's standing behind the dike/dam and uses a sewing machine to search for some worms."
(what's the correct english translation here?)
Dutch spelling: "Hest ook boer Haarms al zeen? Dy staat/stiet met naaimasjine achterd diek aan't wormen syken/zeuken."
German spelling: "Häst ok Buér Harms al sehn? De staht/stoat mit Naimäschkien achter'd Diek ahnt Wurm' sök'n."
Translations:
Dutch: "Heb je boer Haarms al gezien? Die staat met een naaimachine achter de dijk (en is) aan het wormen zoeken."
German: "Hast du Bauer Harms schon geseh'n? Der steht mit 'ner Nähmaschine hinter'm Deich am Würmer suchen."
English: "Did you see Farmer Haarms? He's standing behind the dike/dam and uses a sewing machine to search for some worms."
(what's the correct english translation here?)
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Dike / dyke is good. But kinda old bcz since the 60's it is more used for lesbians.
Dam or embankment is more 21st century
Maar ik snap de grap niet
Soort mierenneuker?
Thanks!Dike / dyke is good. But kinda old bcz since the 60's it is more used for lesbians.
Dam or embankment is more 21st century
Maar ik snap de grap niet
Soort mierenneuker?
I think he’s just the east-frysian version of Mr. Bean. I believe there must have been hundreds of farmer haarms jokes out there, but this is the only one that I know. I think they have been around with the intention to make fun of weird ideas, or to teach others “how not to be a farmer”. Maybe he thinks that those worms are destroying his dam, I actually don’t know ^^ Maybe he’s a person that tends to go for quick and primitive solutions, in the sense of “look, it’s so easy!”
Gotta love ubisoft <3 (not because of graphics, this is stupid, but because of the total lack of ideas)
Story of my life, and I'm not even "a senior citizen".I wonder what dear old George would think about the language of today...
I wrote a few lines to express my point of view on how the offense is in the mind of the speaker and not in the word itself but I'm pretty sure that would be considered political talk and not acceptable. Ah, the irony.
(I'm an extremely progressive guy but use too direct words, apparently. i.e. old is old, handicap is handicap)
So some spirits are in heaven or whatever and they all discuss and brag about how they died.
First guy says that he was crusing down a highway with Lamborghini and went into the wrong lane with 250 mph
Second guy laughs and says that he was in a war, stepped on a landmine.
Third guy who looks rather sad compared to the rest. Afrer a sigh he tells them he died of old age when waiting for Cyberpunk 2077 to be released.
First guy says that he was crusing down a highway with Lamborghini and went into the wrong lane with 250 mph
Second guy laughs and says that he was in a war, stepped on a landmine.
Third guy who looks rather sad compared to the rest. Afrer a sigh he tells them he died of old age when waiting for Cyberpunk 2077 to be released.
A guy comes home from work unexpectedly, suspecting that his wife may be having an affair and determined to catch her. He barges into the bedroom...and finds her alone. She's surprised and upset as he begins frantically searching all over the house for the guy she's cheating on him with. He searches the closets, the cupboards -- anywhere someone might be hiding. All the while, his wife is hollering that he's acting like a lunatic an swearing no one is there.
As he's just beginning to calm down, he hears something from the balcony. He rushes out to it, and sure enough, there's a handsome, muscular, young guy hanging from it, trying to pull himself back up. In a blind rage, his wife screaming in panic, he goes into the kitchen, hoists their refrigerator, and hurls it down onto the man hanging from the balcony. But the exertion is too much, and he suffers a fatal, heart attack from the stress and strain.
The husband finds himself waiting in line for the Pearly Gates. He overhears St. Peter ask the guy in front of him how he died and why he believes he should be admitted into heaven, and the guy goes, "I was just out on my balcony exercising, doing pull-ups on the balcony above me like I always do, when this lunatic suddenly drops a friggin' refrigerator on me! I died instantly!" St. Peter forgives his sins and lets him enter.
The husband hears this, and steps up to St. Peter. He immediately begins to confess: "I was so sure my wife was having an affair, and then I found the man you just spoke to hanging from my balcony. I lost my mind! I'm so sorry for it, and I just can't ask for forgiveness." St. Peter commends him for being honest and remorseful and lets him enter.
The next man steps up, looking confused. St. Peter asks him how he died and why he should be admitted into heaven. The guy stares little blankly at him and says, "I have no idea. I was hiding in a refrigerator. Now, I'm here."
As he's just beginning to calm down, he hears something from the balcony. He rushes out to it, and sure enough, there's a handsome, muscular, young guy hanging from it, trying to pull himself back up. In a blind rage, his wife screaming in panic, he goes into the kitchen, hoists their refrigerator, and hurls it down onto the man hanging from the balcony. But the exertion is too much, and he suffers a fatal, heart attack from the stress and strain.
The husband finds himself waiting in line for the Pearly Gates. He overhears St. Peter ask the guy in front of him how he died and why he believes he should be admitted into heaven, and the guy goes, "I was just out on my balcony exercising, doing pull-ups on the balcony above me like I always do, when this lunatic suddenly drops a friggin' refrigerator on me! I died instantly!" St. Peter forgives his sins and lets him enter.
The husband hears this, and steps up to St. Peter. He immediately begins to confess: "I was so sure my wife was having an affair, and then I found the man you just spoke to hanging from my balcony. I lost my mind! I'm so sorry for it, and I just can't ask for forgiveness." St. Peter commends him for being honest and remorseful and lets him enter.
The next man steps up, looking confused. St. Peter asks him how he died and why he should be admitted into heaven. The guy stares little blankly at him and says, "I have no idea. I was hiding in a refrigerator. Now, I'm here."